5 Things You Need to Stop Doing Right Now if You Want to Be Truly Happy
We all want to live contented and satisfied lives. At our core, we just want to be happy. But chasing the happiness rainbow can be frustrating and elusive. The truth is that being or feeling happy is a state of mind that is influenced by the beliefs that have ingrained themselves into our psyche and how we view our circumstances. How you view yourself and your circumstances can affect your happiness and your ability to work through your feelings of unhappiness.
When you lose sight of what really matters you lose yourself in the process and end up feeling powerless, frustrated, and hopeless. But by taking simple steps to change your mindset and outlook, you’ll start on a path toward a happy and gratifying life, one that is empowered, fulfilling, and satisfying.
Let’s look at the 5 things you need to stop doing right now if you want to be truly happy.
1. Stop living in the past or in the future.
Living in the past causes regrets and depression and living in the future causes anxiety. You can’t change the past and you don’t know the future. Meanwhile, the present is passing you by and you are not enjoying life’s precious moments and you are not fully engaged with what’s going on in your life today.
2. Stop having unrealistic expectations about others and about yourself.
Stop thinking that people are going to react a certain way, will always do the right thing, or will say a kind word. People are not going to act the way you expect them to act, and when you expect too much from someone they inevitably end up disappointing you. Don’t have unrealistic expectations about yourself either. Stop putting pressure on yourself to overperform and to be perfect. Allow yourself to be okay where you are. Stop thinking that you have to have more, do more, and be more. If you believe this, you will always be playing catch-up and be in a permanent state of dissatisfaction. While a certain degree of dissatisfaction acts as a catalyst for change, constantly being dissatisfied with your life will put you in a negative space and you will overlook the positive things going on around you. And this happens when you are constantly comparing yourself to others whether you realize it or not. Stop comparing yourself to others. Don’t let family, society, religion define your path in life. Be comfortable in the place where you are right now if you’re on a road you’ve chosen. Don’t put arbitrary timelines, deadlines, and schedules that someone else decided for you.
3. Stop the intellectual and creative stagnation.
Never stop growing creatively and intellectually. Remember that humans are creative by nature and we desire to express ourselves. Stimulate your mind and release your creative energy by learning new things, sharpening your skills. Take an art class, learn to play an instrument, learn a new language, learn sign language…It’s never too late and you should always be on a quest for self-improvement, self-growth, and creative expression.
4. Stop neglecting your spirituality.
Remember that you are a spiritual being. “We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience.” the French philosopher Pierre Teilhard de Chardin wisely said. Connect with that Higher Power, Source, God on a daily basis, Meditate or pray to clear your mind, revitalize your spirit and realize that you are not alone in this universe. Start your day with a prayer or meditation of gratitude and positive intent to receive happiness and love. Connect to the infinite source of love and wisdom to nourish your spirit and mind and understand that you are much more than your circumstances. Look for happiness with your spiritual eyes and you will find it around you and in you.
5. Stop thinking that you have to be happy all the time.
Let’s face it. Sometimes life is hard and there will be moments and even days where you just want to get in your jammies, crawl under your covers, and let the world around you go to pot. And that’s okay. Have a good cry. Sleep. Eat some pretzels dipped in Nutella. Learn to work through your negative emotions and process those feelings. Give yourself permission to be human, to feel sad, discouraged, and unhappy. And when you’re ready, get up, shake off the doldrums and go conquer the world all over again. The point is that YOU decide. No one can be happy every single moment. To tell you that you choose your happiness would be disingenuous and false. The key is to develop an emotional awareness where you can develop your emotional IQ.
Live a contented and satisfied life
Feeling happy is a state of empowerment, and it’s also a balancing act. You’re juggling day-to-day banalities while prioritizing what’s important and what’s not, what works for you and what doesn’t. It’s accepting the negative feelings and understanding that each day brings its ups and downs. You are in charge of your own mood and you should not let others dictate how you should feel. Perhaps you gave away control of your emotions and thoughts to outside influences and external factors but it’s time to take it back and be in charge of your own destiny and feelings. No one or nothing can put you in a corner unless you allow it. Embrace your emotions. Work through them and you will live a more contented, satisfying, and empowered life.